60 months

Children have such an incredible power over their parents.
They can totally crush you with a few words, a look, a turn of the head when you ask for a cuddle.

My daughter has had this power over me.
She knows how to push my buttons. She knows what upsets me. I actually think she knows that she holds my happiness in her chubby little fists.
It has been a difficult journey of tears, tantrums and fist banging – and that’s just me.
She is independent, strong willed, a free spirit, I get that, I really do. And I love that she is such a firebrand. But it’s been hard; she gets so angry, really really angry and when I’ve gone to bed with my head in my hands wondering where on earth I go wrong, I then beat myself up by convincing myself I’m the World’s Worst Mother for even thinking such a thing.
And all she needs to do to make all the hurt, the upset, the frustration go away, is hug me. Throw her little arms around my hips and bury her head in my stomach.
When she knows she’s really upset me she’ll look up with those big brown eyes and say: “I love you so much mummy.”
Today she is 5. And this week I have seen a big change in her. Almost a leap forward.
It’s like she knows she is expected to grow up now and she’s rising to the challenge.
It’s been a difficult journey Mia, but actually, looking back, I don’t think I’d change a thing.
Happy birthday my gorgeous, cheeky, sassy little girl.
Love mummy x
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