Alice in Wonderland through the eyes of a 7 year old

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I am a movie anorak.
My son is turning into one too and, oh joy, is old enough to come with me now and I am in celluloid heaven.

So tonight we went to see the hotly anticipated Alice in Wonderland Tim Burton movie.
Of course, the thing about Tim Burton is that is movies are slightly ‘odd’.
We love odd.

Dan: “The Hatter is wicked. The smiley cat is pretty good and I liked the fat boys, but the Hatter was sooo cool.”
That, my friends is a glowing endorsement.

However I managed to ruin it all, totally and utterly ruin it.
Oh internet, I hang my head in shame.

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Dan: “Why is her head so big? Sooo big. Look at it, it’s all wrong mummy. What did they do to that lady to make it like that?”
The Red Queen does look exquisitely out of proportion.
Me: “It’s just a part of the film making, Dan. It’s all done using special effects.”
Blank look.
Me: “They can make things look like they’re happening when they’re not. Like when Alice drank the potion and shrunk or ate the cake and grew. It’s not real, they’ve just made it look like that for the film. It doesn’t actually happen.”

There is a long pause as he digests this and he’s looking at me quizzically. Then a cold realisation creeps down my spine as it dawns on me that a little boy’s dreams have been unceremoniously shattered by his wicked wicked mummy as right there and then she ruins the magic of the movies for him.
And next week I’ll be telling him there’s no such thing as Santa.

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