friends41When my son started going to nursery at the age of 7 months, he met Heather.
They journeyed through various classrooms together, a close knit little duo who played, laughed, cried and grew together.

These two young children were inseparable, something which is quite unusual at such a young age.
At the age of about three, the nursery split Dan and Heather up and put them in different classrooms. It didn’t go down well at all. The staff had to regularly take them by the hand and ensure one could visit the other’s room at some point in the day.


Now, they are both 7 years old and that bond is still there.

Dan is a typical ‘lad’: loves sport and fighting, hates girls and kissing, wants to impress his mates and has serious issues about kissing his mum at the school gate.
And yet, he still wants Heather at his parties, he still wants to visit her, he still wants to be her friend.
Theirs in a lovely friendship; a bond born of real chemistry and of a shared history.

My daughter has not experienced anything like this. She has acquaintances, people she will play with, people she likes. But nothing like this.
friends2I wonder how many others children grow up with that sort of friendship? And I wonder how long it will last?

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33 Responses to Friends

  1. Insomniac Mummy says:

    I made some real life friends from mums I initially only knew through a parenting/weaning forum. I hope blogging will eventually extend the same opportunity.

    You're right, you do just 'know' when another blogger is your kind of person, moreso than through a forum I think.


  2. Good topic, Tara. I guess I consider I am making some friends through blogging (I hope… unless I'm reading it all wrong) and I think if you're a WAHM or SAHM then that 'virtual' contact can be really important. I'm hoping to meet some of the bloggers in person over the coming months… I only wish there was some sort of National Mummy Blogging event where everyone could get together… or maybe there is and I haven't been invited… hello? hello? anyone there?

  3. Tara says:

    I think it's only a matter of time Liz before such an event is launched. And can you imagine what we'll all be like? Ah, so you're the one behind XXX blog! I thought you'd be much taller/blonder/loud etc etc!

    You're spot on with the WAHM/SAHM issue. The world is such a small place now and there is a friendly 'face' out there no matter what time you log on. x

  4. MuddyNoSugar says:

    Thanks have cheered me up on a day when I am snotty, coughy and have lost my voice (which may be a blessing for those around me!) You too..first proper new friend I have made in years, but slowly beginning to make some friends in the blogosphere.

  5. I have yet to meet a fellow blogger! I do wonder what you all look like though. Obviously you'll be relieved to find I do look exactly like the laughing horse in my picture…

  6. Linda says:

    Hi Tara, yes I have made friends, real ones. I was very lucky and went on a trip of a lifetime together with six other bloggers. If I'm honest the reason it was a "trip of a lifetime" was because of the women on it. I knew of two of them before because of their blogs and knew how good their blogs were. One of them got in touch with me, not knowing we were going to meet when she read an anonymous blog (since deleted) about something very painful and personal that was happening to me. She didn't know me from Adam and there she was reaching out to me, I was blown away and as I have said somewhere else I was equally blown away when weeks later she got off the scariest rollercoaster we had been on and looked like she was going to spew! What I would say is that I could sort of tell I would like the lot of 'em from reading their blogs and there was a respect there for their writing but it wasn't until we had physically met and felt so at ease with each other in about ooh, half an hour that I would say we became "friends".

  7. This is a nice award Tara. Congratulations. I do think you can become friends through blogging. I have two or three followers which I have exchanged emails with and have had personal conversations with. I'm making plans to meet at least one or two of them. I also exchange books through the mail with another reader of mine, who I like to consider a friend. I think the web is great for expanding your world and meeting people who are more like you. Sometimes it's difficult to find those people around you especially if you have unique tastes, like me, who lives around Americans who don't want to hear about Britain all the time. I'm sure it gets annoying. 😉

  8. I've met one fellow blogger so far and exchanged emails with a couple. And I encouraged two friends to start blogging who are now seasoned bloggers – Four Down Mum to Go and Nota Bene.

    I think moving to another country has been much easier for me having so many online 'friends' to share and exchange opinions with. Real friends are great, and I communicate with them through Facebook and email, but blogging friends have been indispensable too.

  9. Mwa says:

    I'm still relatively new to this thing, but I've already emailed with some people. I'm loving it and I'm hoping to get some friendships out of it.

  10. That girl39 says:

    Lovely Tara lady! We will meet one of these day… I just know that! I love blogging for this very reason… the wonderful friends I have made. I think those that don't blog don't get it but that's fair enough. I am honoured to call myself your friend! xx

  11. S'good question. I've had one good meeting in my previous incarnation and there are a few people I susepct I'd get on with. I've even exchanged family gifts w/one blogger and there have been a few supplementary emails with others. Friends? I really don't know. What's a friend, exactly?

    Of course, the Hadrian's Walk is going to be a bit of a litmus test as to whether I can stand the company of large numbers of other bloggers in a generic sense.

  12. Littlemummy says:

    I've made friends with bloggers both on the Disney trip and here in Edinburgh, there's a definite bond from the outset.

  13. Tara says:

    I've never taken part in forums, but it's really interesting what you say about blogging offering a better opportunity for getting to know someone.
    I guess online relationships are much like off line ones, in that you have to invest in them

  14. Tara says:

    Wonder what we all look like? We are all gorgeous MH, each and every one of us. Except maybe some of the dads. Not too sure about the dads . . .

  15. Tara says:

    That is such a great story Linda. You were all so lucky to have experienced that trip – aren't there some amazing people out there.

  16. Tara says:

    We LOVE that you're unique SBB! We wouldn't have you any other way!

  17. Tara says:

    That's really interesting to hear how blogging friendships helped your move abroad.
    And I love your comment: "Real friends are great . . . but blogging friends have been indispensable too"

  18. Tara says:

    Now, that walk will be interesting . . .
    Trouble is I want someone to come back and blog about how they lost it and gave someone else a bloody nose. Or something.
    Is that going to be you? Or will you be the big softie who gets everyone together for a group hug. Hmm, haven't quite pinned you down just yet.

  19. Absolutely, especially when you meet in person. Since I travel a lot, I've met fellow mummy bloggers the world over. There are some I haven't met, and because we've supported each other through tough times, I do feel a special bond. Weird, but true.

  20. joanne says:

    I was pondering this one this morning actually! Normally I'd have said that you can't be real friends with someone you've never met, yet if they support you and make you laugh or cheer you up – surely that's friendship. There have been many times I've had a better day due to comments or e/mails from fellow bloggers.

  21. Dave says:

    Thanks Tara! You're just too lovely for words.
    You helped me out loads when I first got online and you continue to support my sporadic blogging efforts even to this day.
    Thank you for being such a good friend. 🙂

  22. Chris says:

    My blog has led me to more than just a friendship with one person. Through the occasional comments and then emails through the blog, we shared our very similar stories – and made a very solid connection. Six months of 'chatting' on email, MSN, Facebook, etc eventually turned into a real life face to face meeting. This was over 18 months ago, and we are now very much 'an item', alternating on who makes the 3 hour trip (avec kids!) to be together at least every other week. I would not have met her without the web, and would not have had the chance to replace the sorrow with joy.

  23. Tara says:

    Wow. That is fabulous. Just shows what can happen when you least expect it and when you aren't actually looking.
    I wish you both every happiness (and hope that journey shortens some day!)

  24. Tara says:

    It's funny, because I was actually thinking of you when I wrote this!
    I know you have been transplanted from your 'home' town and have found the move difficult at times.
    I'm really pleased to hear that bloggers have helped turn your days around. x

  25. Dan says:

    We've been on holiday to the states twice to visit a blogging friend and his family, and he's been over here once.

    In addition rouhgly 15 blogging friends from the uk, holland, and the usa are joining me on my walk of Hadrian's wall next summer. Ithink I can class all thoses as real friends.

    it's all good stuff.

  26. I await the much more illuminating post you obviously have brewing about the arseholes you have met via blogging. In fact, that would make a greater meme.

  27. elizabethm says:

    I have met four bloggers over the three years I have been blogging and they are all fabulous. I had probably been commenting on their blogs and knew they were reading mine for a couple of years first. We met as a group and spent the day together and it was amazing how quickly and easily we gelled. Since then we meet up as a group from time to time and I have met all of them individually. i am sure there must be the odd horror story but for me it has been nothing but great!

  28. Writer Dad says:

    Yup, I met one of my best friends and current business partner through blogging, and after like an hour and a half!

  29. Tara says:

    I'm sure you could muster up some words if you were pushed . . .

  30. I think you can make real friends blogging, but it does feel a little odd, to be honest. But I think that's the expat perspective. Meeting up is never really going to be an option – or only if you're very lucky.

    It feels odd at first, but once you've got used to it, it's a great support.

  31. mothership says:

    I have met and made friends through blogging even though it seemed a bit odd at first. In many ways I feel more connected to the people I correspond with this way than the people I see on a daily basis because I'm so far from my 'real' home, being an expat (sniff).

  32. Kelly says:

    I have also met and made friends through blogging, before becoming a 'mummy blogger' when I was just a normal 'blogger' and in the past few months since I started blogging when on maternity leave. It is always so odd to meet people in real life that you already know a lot about, but for little old me and my paralysing fear of talking to strangers sometimes I think it is the best way for me to make friends.

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